What Is A Home?

A couple weeks back, I was a 'mom on a mission'.

Getting my house in order for a wedding shower I was throwing.

It was not a fun week. It was a crazy week. Errands that needed to be run, deep cleaning that needed to happen. While I like to think we typically keep a fairly clean and organized home (I said, fairly) I was going to do my darndest to make sure it was in tip-top shape.

As close to perfection as I could come.

I love hosting parties (or I did until that week) and rarely worry about so many little pieces of the puzzle, but for some reason I could not let it go. I had been in some of the invited's immaculate homes where not a handprint was seen on the wall. And there was the itty bitty, teeny weeny voice telling me that I couldn't compare.

So I worked hard. Long days. Late nights.

Our babysitter spent several hours here one day helping with the kids so I could just keep on keeping on.

J reminded me over and over and over again that really as long as the house is picked up and clean the rest would be fine but I couldn't let it go.

My couches with spit up stains and spilt water marks glared at me. As did my light colored carpet with dark colored stains. The ledge in our kitchen with paint chipped off from too many cars racing on it.

It wouldn't be perfect.

Saturday came and the guests all arrived. And the sweat was a drippin' in my black dress.

But no one seemed to notice the cobwebs outside the front door that I noticed five minutes before go-time. And not a soul said a word about my other insecurities; the carpet, the couch and the ledge.

Instead, the guests drank coffee and visited and ate the delicious food. Watched the guest of honor open gifts and celebrated with cake.

The shower started at 11 and the last guest left at ten minutes after 3.

Four hours.

Let me inform you that the actual shower was over by about 1:30. The eating, the drinking, the gifts and the games. After that guests mulled around, visited, looked around my house.

For four hours, these guests felt welcome in my home. Welcome to stay as long as they'd like. Welcome to visit and eat and drink and laugh and talk and that it's really ok if they spill because this is not a perfect, immaculate house.

This house isn't just a house, this is our home. Our lived in, trusty, worn in home.

Where there are crumbs and love squished into the carpets and faint handprints never to be removed from the walls.

I have always said that I want my home to be a welcome place where people can gather and visit and be.

And hosting that shower reminded me of exactly what our home is.

A long way away from perfect, but our home.

The bride-to-be and E.

Documenting E's first wedding shower.